Me: so, i went to an evaluation therapist today (i know what you're thinking, "what? YOU see a therapist?" pssst: i only have PTSD from childhood trauma, MDD, social anxiety, & a few other letters after my name that are not connected to a degree of ANY earhtly kind).
Therapist: Can you tell me who is the current POTUS?
Me: (what feels like a long pause). . .
Therapist: (sounding a lot like ronald reagan) Well, . . .
Me: (clears throat) I think I can. It's (Tim Allen coined the phrase "Verp," meaning those times when you burp & a lil bit of vomit comes to the back of your throat) Well, . . . (in my head I sound like Reagan, now) yes, it's Donald Trump. It's not that I don't know the current president, but this is my first time actually saying it out loud (as if holding it in makes it pretend), & I didn't want to vomit on your beautiful (ahem--pretentious) office.
Therapist: Can you tell me the previous president?
Me: (sits up straight, smiles) Yes, the man that allowed me unemployment benefits that I cannot get now, medical, dental, & ocular care that even i could afford, Former Commander in Chief Barack Obama!!!
Therapist: I don't think you need therapy anymore. You seem very sane (that was his joke).
